Many books each year are written to help people with various aspects of their lives and careers. The topics are varied and include motivation, procrastination and time management. But by far the greatest numbers of books written and purchased are on the topics of developing confidence and improving personal assertiveness.
An individual’s level of self-confidence and assertiveness has a direct bearing on success and achievement. This includes success in their career and business alike. A lot of successful people have attributed their success to the development of assertiveness and confidence.
Essential to achieving important goals, assertiveness and confidence are on the top of the list. Although various people express both assertiveness and confidence naturally, others must take time to develop them.
Try these 5 tips for improving your assertiveness and confidence:
1. Eliminate Shyness: Shyness is sensitivity in the interpersonal realm. Many think shyness is the result of low self-esteem but that would be incorrect. Shy individuals many times have healthy levels of self-esteem. Here are some suggestions for eliminating shyness:
- Practice visualization: Use your imagination to rehearse the positive outcome of situations where you would normal act shy. See the outcome resulting in positive and constructive behavior on your part.
- Practice speaking: A source of shyness for many is they are not use to hearing their own voice. Taking some time to practice speaking and developing your voice will lead to more confidence.
- Practice positive affirmations: It is common to for the shy individual to have negative self-talk which undermines confidence. Practice positive affirmations to replace negative self-talk with positive.
2. Avoid aggressiveness and embrace assertiveness: There is difference between being aggressive and being assertive. It is important to know the difference.
- Aggressiveness is more about control over the other person and doesn’t take the feelings or rights of the other person in account.
- Assertiveness is initiative that is considerate for the other individual, their feeling and their rights to make their own decisions.
- When you are exercising assertiveness, you will want to do it with respect and consideration for the other person. Always keep it positive and constructive.
3. Be Prepared: A contributing factor for shyness is not being prepared for certain situations. If you must give a talk on a particular subject, make sure you have prepared in advance and know your material.
- Knowing what you are talking about when it comes to a particular subject will enhance your confidence and assertiveness.
- You should always be ready for question from others. If you have prepared properly you will be able to answer the questions confidently. Try rehearsing how you would answer various sample questions.
4. Speak with Authority: If you speak with authority in every situation you will maintain your level of confidence much easier. Speaking with authority will also promote your assertive attitude also.
5. Find good role models: Find a role model that expresses confidence and assertiveness and practice how they behave.
- Watch how they act in certain situations.
- Note the words they use and how they speak.
- Notice their body language and model it.
By taking the time to find those who have mastered the qualities you want to express is a good way to incorporate those qualities into your behavior.
No one should tell you that developing more confidence or assertiveness is going to be easy to do. It will require that you learn what it means to be confident and assertive as well as practicing it for yourself.
Regardless of your current level of confidence or assertiveness, have faith that you can develop the traits. By following the tips outlined above you should be on your way to improving your assertiveness and confidence.
